190. The Love Tumble {with Sam}

Welcome to 100 Ways. This is your daily exploration of self and soul. I'm your host and fellow explorer, Laura Christine. Let's dive in and find our way home. Hey, I'm with my friend Sam tonight. He said something. That his friend said, what'd you hear. Do you remember it? She said. You can use love or you can use logic. But you can't use both at the same time. and what she was referring to was, Like the choosing to fall in love with somebody, the choosing to be attractive to somebody like choosing a person. As a potential partner. Okay. Okay. I like where this is going now because at. I don't think necessarily that we're choosing. To fall in love or to. What was the other part? Be attracted to someone at twice. So. As a choice. No, it's a choice. What you do with it. But if attraction is happening, attraction is happening. I'm not attracted. Attraction is happening. And then I choose, do I flow with that and find out, or do I not? That's where the choice comes in. Okay, but what is the thing that you're being attracted to in that instance? It's like a superficial. Attraction level. No, or now you've, you've like gotten to know somebody and you. Decided that you were attracted to who they were. You were like, this is who this person is and you chose the narrative for who they were, and then you decided you were attracted to them. So we're attracted to the narrative that we're making up about something. I think so. Yeah, because that happens. Our experience of life. Our experience of reality is pretty much entirely hallucinated by our brain using the various sensory organs that we have. like, The center of my eyeball. Right behind my pupil has no photo receptors. Sculpture optic disc. There's a blind spot there. And your brain is filling that in. It's it's making it up. So when I look as I am directly at you right now, I don't see you. I see a copy of you that I am putting together from when I saw you in my periphery and could actually see what you look like. I don't know that I'm looking at you. My brain is generating the image of you. So we choose these things though. We're actively making these choices. That's kind of a hard concept for a lot of people to stomach. Because it makes you responsible for your entire life. And once. Become responsible for your entire life. You realize that you can't be a victim anymore. Yeah. And all the bullshit you've been telling yourself falls apart. And that can be really traumatizing and terribly. Scary for most people too. You know, encounter. I guess. so. That's the love and logic thing. Right. Like love. Oftentimes doesn't make a lot of sense. If we do stuff. That's counterintuitive to our own. Safety our own mental wellbeing, our own. Ability to thrive. Because of that emotional content. But I think that's because we are loving. The image that we're creating. So we were just loving the story that we're creating. Right. we're choosing that, or we're choosing to not do that. We're choosing. To not. Kind of behave in a willfully ignorant manner. About ourselves. And our feelings. When you start thinking about things in a very logical way, it's, it's hard to just like tumble into love and be it's hard to just sort of like the way you did. I mean, at least I did when I was like a younger person. Late teens, early twenties, you. I would. I, it felt very out of my control. But as, you know, as an adult now I see that I'm, I'm just making all these different choices. and now that I realize that when I start to apply logic to Do I love this person. And um, uh, Morris way in a way that I want, like in a relationship with them, not just like, I love you as my friend. I love lots of people. As my friends. I don't want to like have an intimate relationship with them. that's like a particular choice that you have to make. I want to have an intimate relationship with that person. I. I'm gonna choose that because I love them. But logic will always get in the way of you like falling. Sort of like head over heels for somebody because you're going to be examining every aspect of it the whole way. is this right for me? Is this safe for me? Instead of just being like, Those aren't red flags. This is a carnival. She's hot. I don't care. I love her. There's the choice. I don't care. I'm going to ignore the red flags. I'm just going to go for this. Because I'm not thinking about myself. I'm not thinking about. How. Bad. This is going to go in the end, you know? And you learn and you eventually learned. To avoid those things because you use logic to do it. We went on and on. And on. And on about. A lot of different loops around this subject. A lot of the things we talked about are very. Uh, significant for a lot of us, including authenticity. So we're going to dive into more of this with Sam. And I hope you enjoyed this episode. We will be back tomorrow. In the meantime and go to buy me a coffee.com/ 1 0 0 ways. And support the show. You can also book yourself a session with me if you need, or are looking for any kind of clarity. Until next time we're sending all the love and then some more. We'll talk tomorrow Thank you for exploring with me today. I would love to continue this conversation with you. We can do that at laurachristine. us. You'll find contact in the menu or you can go to laurachristine. us slash contact and you'll be taken right to it. Let's dive in a little deeper and see how fully we can flow with the duh.